Sunday, January 27, 2008


"Pastor Renee Brewster and her husband Bishop Winston Brewster are a very spiritual couple. But the site of their savior in a potato has reinvigorated their faith and their desire to help others." (MyFox Orlando)

I did not make up that quote.

I mean, you have to be spiritual to see Jesus in a potato. Or tortilla. Or frying pan. Or oyster. (Or another oyster.) Or pirogi. Or grease stain. Or water stain. Or dog's butt.

I mean, what other reason could there be, but spirituality?

(With deep and sincere apologies to Ira and George Gershwin...)

You say “potato”, and I say “Jesus”
You say “hey, wait—Oh, just look at the pieces!”
Right there in the bowl, he’s so wonderfully holy
Let’s call the guys at Fox!
You say “sandwich”, and I say “Mary”
You think it’s grand, which I think is just scary
But you need no urgin’ to see you a virgin
Let’s call the guys at Fox!

And Oh!—if we call the guys at Fox
We’ll make the news.
And Oh!—If we’re on the news,
There’s no way we can lose

So if you say “tortilla”, and I say “Jesus”
I promise I’ll see a real face in the cheeses
How lucky would we be, to be on the TV
Let’s call the guys at Fox--
Let’s call the guys at Fox!


The Ridger, FCD said...

Your rhymes are brilliant ... "sandwich - grand which" is good, but "potato - wait oh" and "tortilla - see a" are amazing.

bioephemera said...

You made me snort. Loudly and inappropriately. This is EXACTLY why I have Fox News blocked on my television. . .

the mad LOLscientist said...

Brilliant parody. Absolutely brilliant. Doesn't it figure that Faux News would be the one reporting on this nonsense?

@bioephemera: I'd block Faux News too, but I'd catch hell from one of my housemates. I should do it anyway, but I'm too nice. Pity.