Nathaniel Jeanson, Stealth Ph. D.

Nate was a Creationist, who hated bugs and blood,
And he wondered, "What's the perfect job for me?"
He could spread the word of Jesus, the Creation, and the Flood,
If he got a Harvard Medical Degree!

It would give him credibility, and earn him some respect,
And would help him to evangelize, he said.
Since he claimed a higher calling--there were souls he must protect--
It's ok if his advisors were misled.

His profs expected honesty; they treated him with trust.
Did they mold him to a scientist? They tried...
When he found a contradiction, he would manage as he must;
He just murmured "What would Jesus do?", and lied.

With degree in hand, and facing competition for a job,
Why, he found a path much easier by far!
"Why bother with competing with the Harvard Med School mob,
I can lie for Jesus, at the I.C.R.!"

Now he's got a shiny title; he'll do research, speak, and write,
With his Harvard cred to use and to abuse,
And he'll make "eternal friends" (a fact which brings him great delight),
While the people who need medicine? ... they lose.


Cuttlecap tip to PZ, of course.