Sunday, November 16, 2008

The Digital Cuttlefish, Vol. 1 (book) has arrived!

It’s the latest in technology, delivered to your door
Like the internet, but portable—why, who could ask for more?
All that Cuttlefishy goodness, but in one convenient book
What a marvelous invention; don’t you want to take a look?

You can take it to the mountains; you can take it to the park;
With a flashlight or a candle, you can read it in the dark!
It’s much lighter than a laptop, so transporting it’s a breeze
There’s no silicon or plastic—nope, it’s all recycled trees!

You could buy one for your Mother; you could buy one for your Pop
You could buy one for your Pastor just to hear him holler “stop!”
You could buy a bunch, and swap out all the hymnals in a church
So they never find “Amazing Grace” no matter where they search!

You could pull one on the Gideons, and place them in hotels
You could slip one to a Wiccan while she’s murmuring her spells
It’s the perfect gift for enemies—the perfect gift for friends!
It’s the gift that keeps on giving—oh, the messages it sends!

Be the first one on your block to place your order—click today,
And the elf and fairy printers will get on it right away!

That’s right; with heart in throat, I am announcing the dead-trees version of The Digital Cuttlefish, Vol. 1, available for purchase at Over a hundred verses, representing (more or less) the first year of… whatever it is that I do. Just in time for Cephalopodmas, Squidmas, Christma-Hanu-Rama-Ka-Dona-Kwaanza, or maybe somebody’s birthday.

Support independent publishing: buy this book on Lulu.


Blake Stacey said...

To this I say, woo hoo!
For such is the delight
It has brought me on this night
Of Net-fuelled consternation
And intense procrastination
That I promptly blogged about the news.

Laurie said...

Darn! I just ordered my 2009 calendars from Lulu. I should have waited. Such is life. Can't wait for it to arrive!

eliza ann said...

Bravo, DC!

Jeanette said...

I ordered mine! So hurry up and get to Kinko's Copier, will ya?

mindlesley said...


Every dog has its day,
Any breed, pure or stray,
Despite its family DNA,
Every Pooch will have its day.

Everyone loves a fluffy Maltese,
Who can ignore a Labrador,
Not only French, do Poodles please,
Corgis, not only Royals a-dore.

Every dog has its day,
Dalmatians in cinema- verite,
Retrievers painted by Monet,
Every hound will have its day.

Chihuahuas, all appreciate,
Tho’ they seem a trifle fraught.
Even Bulldogs draw a crowd,
And Shitzu’s very keenly sought.

Every dog has its day,
Any breed, pure or stray,
Despite designer DNA,
Every dog will have its day.

Wrote this when Obama gave his mutt press conference; I thought you might like some of its rhymes. PS can't yet buy book, tho' I'd like to.
'Cause the havoc on W. St. is causing arrthymias in my finances. Your Aussie Mate, Mindlesley

Perky Skeptic said...

Hooray!!! Congratulations! :)

makita said...

Great Cuttle! I got a couple of paper versions. Good idea.

Cuttlefish said...


Thanks to Blake Stacey, some 4 or 5 errors in the first printings have been caught and corrected. I do not know whether those who already ordered will receive the corrected copy or the (now very valuable and rare) first printings with errors.

If you do receive copies with a couple of repeated verses, hold on to them so that the auction years from now will be able to put your kids through school.

(hey, I can dream, can't I?)

Cath@VWXYNot? said...

Damnit, there goes my chance to get my hands on the limited first edition! I will be doing some interent shopping at the weekend (I like to bundle everything together) and I'll definitely be buying this long-overdue volume!

The Ridger, FCD said...

Between you and Ed Yong
Xmas just can't go wrong!

mindlesley said...

I Liked your rhyming tidbit,
Am waiting for your bitchtit,
Happy Xmas/Hannukah & whatever else you want to celebrate - from aussie, Mindlesley

Anonymous said...

Well, I've mentioned it again on Pharyngula - I hope he checks it out and blogs it, it'd be cool to send PZ a copy... I'd be willing to pay for it!